My Sweet Family & Friends,
Hi! It has been a little over two months since I wrote you last - please forgive me. I initially slowed down as we worked on the logistics of my posts, not wanting to overwhelm any one member of my wonderful family with having to type up numerous verbose letters. And then I just got into a funk. Nothing truly terrible, simply an adjustment to my new reality. So please don't worry - I've snapped out of it, all is well, and I will be sure to write more consistently. It really does help me process things and tends to cement in the things God is teaching me.
The past couple of months have flown by - I can't believe we are already half-way through September! I am officially under my two year mark - only 23 miles to go! I have always felt that the first mile or two of any race hurt as your heart and lungs adjust. This has proven to be the same. But the initial shock is over, I have settled into a stride I can maintain for the endurance, and in the back of my head I can hear the voice of a small blue fish: "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..." :)
Thank you for continuing to write me faithfully, even (especially) when I remained so silent. It means more to me than I can say. And thank you so much for all the birthday cards and letters you sent - they were the best! They made me laugh and cry, and laugh so hard I cried. I was so blessed by you. I also received some great books and CD's from friends and family. (Thank You! You know who you are. :)) I have enjoyed them immensely.
Alright, I'm gonna try to give you the condensed version of the past two months: After observing the girls on my yard and hiding in my room until somewhere towards the beginning of July, I decided to venture outside. I made a friend Staci - she is in my counseling group and on my yard. She is normal and nice and loves Jesus. We try to keep each other sane. She introduced me to a few other girls that she is friends with and they've been really great. The Fourth of July was the first day I was able to look around and see the women around me for what they really are - not scary, just broken. It was a good day filled with hamburgers (well - soyburgers) and turkey hotdogs, a big slice of watermelon (Gift #120), corn on the cod & apple pie (#126), frisbees and a hula hoop contest. Oh yes, we found some hula hoops buried in the rec room that day and let me tell you - they provided hours worth of entertainment, despite the 110 degree plus heat. Hula hoops - Gift #127. Lock down is at 8pm and we weren't allowed to stay out in search for fireworks that night. But at 9pm, I decided to peek out the window, just in case, and do you know what I saw? Fireworks. :) Jenny was amazed - she hadn't seen them at all in the three years she's been locked up. We both stood there faces smooshed up against our 5"x24" window, fully aware it was a gift, #125 on my list, I'm not sure what number it was for Jenny. She won't tell me, not until next November. The night before she goes home we're going to read each other our gifts - the ones God has given us while in prison. I'm not sure if we'll make it to one thousand, but I know that if I don't it's not because God hasn't continued to give them, it's because of my lack of discipline in writing them down.
My birthday came later in July and I was showered with cards all month. Thank you! The day after my birthday I got a visit from my boys & husband & in-laws. It was the best gift ever. My sister, brother-in-law and niece are the nicest and come see me just about every single weekend. They stuff me full of over-priced vending machine food and let me win at Sorry and Uno. My Dad, his wife, my brother and his wife, and three of my besties have been able to come up a couple of times also. It has been so nice! I am able to call home just about every night and that has been such a gift. I've survived my first summer with no AC, learned that swamp coolers are laughable during monsoon season, and that they don't work without an adequate water line running to them. In July and August, our rooms stayed at about 96 degrees, colling off to 90 at night if we were lucky. But the worst is over and Fall is just around the corner. I also made it through my first haboob! Two or three, actually, but the first was the worst! Dust blew through the cracks in the door, windows and through the vent, leaving a thin layer over the entire room. I've never seen anything like it.
I've applied to a bunch of jobs, but my schedule is a little wonky with my counseling and computer class, and we aren't a working yard. There are more girls than jobs. So I keep applying, and in the mean time I'm helping a couple of girls in mandatory with their homework so they can pass their test. Mandatory is the class inmates are put in until they can pass at least an 8th grade equivalency test. Until they pass, they can't make more than 10 cents per hour and they don't qualify for their 85%. I'm still reading A Lot - more than I ever have. I'm on book 36 right now - C.S. Lewis' Till We Have Faces. I also finished my chronological Bible reading plan last week, finishing in a little over 2.5 months. I'm currently doing a study on Romans. God continues to teach me something new every day. I could fill books. But this letter is getting long and for the sake of my sister I'm going to wrap it up. I'll write again soon - for reals. In the meantime, know that I love you, I think about and pray for you daily and miss you fiercely. Please pray for the girls on Santa Cruz, and for me too. "...but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope." Romans 5:3-4.
Love from Fat Camp,
Missy
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